I’m lucky. 

I have a lot of friends. I make sure not to define “friends” too narrowly.

My dog is my friend. 

My lover is my friend. 

My daughter is my friend.

My healing community are my friends. 

And many, many friends that lie in the traditional definition of “friend” abound in my life.

My mother and grandmother taught me the value of friendship. They would always sing that ever-familiar song: Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver and the other gold.

I like to think I have a lot of friends because I am a good friend. I always try to be there for the people I care about, and I always choose to WANT to be there. I don’t look at it as something I have to do. I do it for me, because that makes me feel more love and that feels good.

I have lost several really good friends over the past few years, and I am feeling, more than ever, an urgency to make time for dinners and parties, lunches and coffees, birthdays and Christmases.

Time can be a funny, elusive thing, and “seize the day” is the advice I am following for making and choosing time with the people I love.

So this week, write a card, make a phone call, have a coffee, and reach out to an old friend. It makes you feel good. And let the love come back.


“A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself.”

-Jim Morrison